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You know that feeling…..

I woke up this morning feelin’ Happy.

I know there are a lot of things to not feel happy about atm, but I could not help myself.

Before I went to bed last night I found out that another queer hangout I have enjoyed over the years (Kafe Copacabana, Hornstull in Stockholm) had closed down. I do not know the full story and hopefully the lovely owners and Patrons are happy with this decision… But for all of us who met there when in town, who sat there writing and spending hours over the coffee and toasted sandwiches… for us they leave a hole. A massive  queer comfortable hole… As usual when things close, end and stop.

I woke up this morning feelin’ happy as Wotever is happening…

Yes, It does and I do not mean any disrespect to anyone doing stuff and then it does not work out… OOOhhhh myyyy so many times I’ve struggled and felt despair about events with no people and or when I myself have taken upon myself the role of Producer, PR Person, Technician, Compere, Door person and DJ in the same event… just because there wasn’t enough people to help and or not enough money to pay more people… I can not count the times when I’ve thought, ‘I end this and stop doing Wotever, and take a proper 9-5 job again’ It is HARD to run stuff and struggle every time you have to make ends meet…. it is!

But,

Wotever World is what I’ve created and I felt happy this morning because I have the luxury of waking up in Spain, on Holiday – my first holiday in over six years. Wotever have kept going and what with having events happening all the time, and absolutely noo money to myself, holidays haven’t happen since I quit my full time employment and went freelance… It has been a luxury one could live without.

Me and the beach But now I have one, all provided by two guardian angels who offered me to go and stay in their apartment on the Spanish coast. For a minimal fee… I just needed to pay my flight and voila – I had it.

I have been here now for more than a week and on Friday I will travel back home.  Rested, relaxed and with so much happiness and headspace. It has indeed been a luxury holiday for me, a time to think. To plan and to look back. Reading and being inspired… It has meant TIME. A luxury indeed. Thank YOU J & A!

I woke up feelin Happy because the other night I spoke to my brother via skype. Im happy because I have the best blood family in the world. My two brothers are very different from me and have chosen very different ways of living, but do recognise me as one of them, and our parents are still here alive and very happy too – enjoying being old age pensioners, retired with all the new skills, eons of time for hobbies they have got (ok – my parents took up ten pin bowling when retired – and are now so good that this is taking up all their time, and they do compete and are both topranked in Sweden…… parents hey 😉 ) Im happy because they are and I am and my brothers are… we all take the day as it is and do enjoy the little things…

I’m happy as Im at the moment reading a book where the main character learnt about Northern Soul in the latest chapter – and here I am, typing away to Northern Soul 101 on my itunes… Inspirational, and so lucky that my computer decided to work again, at the beginning of this holiday it totally died…. mega crisis! but after a chat to the experts  – I will hand it in when back – we do little every day and tip toe around it and it seems to work. So, Im Happy I have this to write on! Carefully typing……

So, what to do later today…..

Keep Happy I think, continue to dress as I do. The other day me and my non binary gender representation was indeed causing questions on the beach…. Me in baggy shorts, big T and with floppy hair was referred to as ‘The kid’ as in, ask the kid by the beach bar ordering a coke when three women wanted to know who was the beach chair seller..

Calling me the kid is quite funny as me with my many years (I’m 51) are def no kid anymore (Im the Daddy – but only for people within the know!)… but it also showed what you are seen as when people can not read you… Male, Female…. ? My face is without facial hair and rather smooth, and my fatty body is def very non descript… so… The Kid?! Who knows, they might have been partially sighted or such so I should not joke too much – but it had me thinking….

Today I will do a few bits and bobs to keep it all rollin’ then later on, I will go down to the beach for the afternoon sun… and after that climbing back up to this little heaven. For a night with some great DVD’s and or such….

If you are in London tonight, go and say hi to Bar Wotever! This evening it’s packed with great Live Music provided by Mel and Kill from Battle of You and the guests they have invited. It’s a night to explore new, young, fresh music at the ‘Legendary Bar Wotever’ as Metro wrote the other day 😉

You should give Maria a massive hug as she is managing and look after the event when Im away, Im so Happy there are so many amazing People looking after Wotever so I can have this holiday! Thank You Maria, Dr J, Liam, Joey, Harry, Kevin, Jonathon, Mel and Kill! You are all Marvellous!! Thank YOU!

And Im Happy because on Friday I will be back in London, ready for the winter and all that it involves of more events, bigger acts and more people to collaborate with….

I’m Happy as Wotever World is still here and stronger than ever.

Thank You!

Here is a video with me interviewing Mel from Battle of You at a previous event…

When I’m back I hope I see you!

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